For the Love of Peanuts (and Hockey)

As a kid I was crazy about Snoopy.  I had all his finest books:  We Love You Snoopy, Here Comes Snoopy, All This and Snoopy Too…   I read them obsessively until the pages were frayed.  My obsession went deep; I sketched Snoopy scenes wherever I went, and much like my kid’s love for Build-A-Bear, I loved my stuffed Snoopy and dressed him for all occasions.

So somehow, when Peanuts references kept coming up at last weekend’s hockey tournament, the true reason I love hockey emerged. I acknowledge that people who don’t play hockey think we’re a bunch of crazy, trash talking women that check each other into the boards and cuss at the refs.  In truth, it’s more like living in a Peanuts cartoon.  As a matter of fact, the entire weekend seemed to step right out of the pages from my vintage Snoopy books.

Warrior Pre-Game Pep Talk

It began with our friend Marla joining us for the weekend.  During the winter season Marla plays with another team, so when Coach Curti gave us a pre-game strategy talk, Marla had no clue what Mike was talking about. Her version of his pep talk looked something like this:

As game one started, Marla had some strategic thoughts of her own that she shared with Mike.  It was received by Mike just as we would expect and looked something like this:

Strategy from the bench

Shortly there after was yet another Peanut tribute.  Brenda’s terrifying slapshot from the point caught the interest of the ref.  Given the fact Brenda was sporting a beautiful pink hair extension (for Pink the Rink Day), her hockey flow took on a special glow while catching the eye of the ref:

The Little Pink Haired Girl (i.e. Brenda!)

This set the stage for the balance of the weekend. Following our Friday game we had a small celebration to commemorate the end of our 2013-14 season.  As we clearly enjoy our team and coaches, appreciation was dispersed to all, with a small token to our humble and lovable coach Mike Curti. Mike graciously bestowed words of encouragement while he undoubtedly pondered the best use of his gift:

Psychiatric help for Coach Curti

In game two, Shannon apparently stole the puck from our Little Pink Haired Girl (Brenda), and I heard it referred to as “Pulling a Lucy.” At this point Shannon’s endearing laughter filled the room and it was suddenly clear who the Snoopy of our Peanuts Gang was:

Shannon’s laughter filling the room after Brenda shoved her face into blueberry pie (You just can’t make this stuff up).

This weekend’s tournament was actually a fund raiser called “Stick it to Cancer.” We were all there honoring friends and family battling cancer.  As I drove home, I found myself grateful that I could be there with such great friends. My thoughts and prayers are with all those dealing with the battle scars of cancer today.  May you all enjoy your present and make memories eternal.

Pond Hockey: A Different Kind of Hockey

Giant Cracks that will engulf your blade without warning

Pond Hockey is a funny thing; totally different than regular hockey.  One difference is the variables beyond your control:  sub-zero temps, cracks in the ice, sun, wind, snow… one year we even had rain with an inch of standing water.  This year’s North American Pond Hockey Championship graciously fell between two extreme weeks of the Minnesota “Polar Vortex.”  As a result, temps for most of our games were a balmy 10 to 15 degrees above zero.

Pond Hockey Net

Another difference in Pond Hockey is goal tending.  There are no goalies in pond hockey, and the net is an odd wooden box with two slots for the puck. To someone who can stick handle, this means you simply finesse past your opponent and stuff the puck in the box.  To me, this means attempting to navigate the puck through cracks in the ice, snow, people, and then tucking it into an itty bitty slot.  In other words, it’s darn near impossible.

A third difference in Pond Hockey is, for some odd reason there aren’t a lot of women’s teams that register. There was a record turnout this year for the North American Pond Hockey Championship with 9 women’s teams (out of 70).  Despite these record numbers, there still weren’t enough teams to divide our brackets into those that are playing in college and those that could be their mothers.  This would put my team (Ms. Conduct) in the same bracket as the rather hilarious college girls (the Flying V)

I may have felt a little like Rocky vs. the Russian, except Rocky is in way better shape, and well, I’m the huge (well padded) one.

A D1 Hockey Bag: A very bad sign when sizing up your opponent.

When you enter the changing area and notice your opponents are carrying D1 Hockey team bags, your strategy changes from winning, to minimizing the point differential.  One tactic might be to mention that your son the med-student might come by to watch.  Another tactic might include turning it into a drinking game.  However, it’s possible the college girls might have started that game already, and it likely doesn’t slow them down as much as you would hope.  Our loss this year to the Flying V’s (the mom in me is pretending “V” stands for Victory) was 28-4. Since it was 15-1 at the first half, we were proud of keeping them down to 13 additional points in the second half and scoring three of our own.

The North American Pond Hockey Championship is funny.  I don’t go there looking for a win (which is obviously a good thing). In a tournament like this, with proceeds going to Defending the Blue Line, I go to enjoy friends and create memories.  A little fresh air and exercise certainly doesn’t hurt either.  Thank you Ms. Conduct for inviting my to join your team, and congrats on your 2-3 record and 7th place finish.  I had a blast!

My new friends from the Ms. Conduct Pond Hockey Team.

“TUT” (Tune Up Tournament)

When Assumptions Are Made (We all know what happens)

Some of the funniest misunderstandings happen when you get too close to something and you fail to step back and see what it might look like to others.  This often happens at work where you assume people understand the acronyms you’re saying.  But when your audience is unfamiliar with your acronym, or perhaps they’re thinking about crazy people when reading your email, suddenly “BP” can turn from British Petroleum to Blood Pressure.

With this in mind, it is the fourth year I’ve been a part of Mike Curti’s “Tune Up Tournament.”  The tournament has always been a chance to play as a team and have some fun before our season begins.  In recruiting teams, Mike blasts out emails with subjects like, “Players Needed for TUT” or, “TUT Exhibition Game.”  I’m absolutely certain Mike thinks “Tune Up Tournament” every time he types the letters T, U, and T.  The problem is, every time I read TUT I think King Tut.

So now the real question is, does Mike really think “Tune Up Tournament,” or perhaps there is a deep dark secret buried in his psyche that looks something like this:

What Mike really thinks as he types “TUT”

Mike orchestrating his “team” from the bench.

On a similar note of misunderstandings, I have to say when not speaking clearly words can end up sounding just as ridiculous.  After all these years of being a part of the Tune Up Tournament, I told my husband what I was doing this weekend and he responded, “A Tuna Tournament?!”

Yes honey.  I’m going to a Tuna Tournament, and it will look something like this:

Where my husband apparently thinks I’m going to play hockey this weekend.